FORGIVENESS IS FOR YOU: Finding Healing, Peace, and Freedom in Christ

FORGIVENESS IS FOR YOU: Finding Healing, Peace, and Freedom in Christ

Martin Luther King, Jr. said “We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies.”

Martin Luther King, Jr. said it beautifully. Forgiveness is about understanding the love we have received from God so we can give it to those who have offended us. Love is the foundation of forgiveness. We cannot give what we have not received. We have received God’s unconditional love and forgiveness, so we can give that same unconditional love and forgiveness to others. If you receive a gift basket, it is in your possession and therefore you are able to do some with what you have received. Our most important aspect of forgiveness is to understand God’s love for us individually. There is a deep satisfaction in knowing we are love by God. When we receive God’s unconditional love, we can give that to others. We cannot give what we have not received.

Forgiveness is not something we cannot hope goes away. It’s either we have forgiven or we haven’t. There is no in between, I believe often times there is a process to forgiveness and there is no one-way to forgiveness and the process is different for everyone.

Letting it Go

At one point we will have to face forgiving imperfect people. The truth is none of us are perfect and every human has a sin nature (Romans 5:12). The sin nature within us will cause us to do things we should not do. Whether we are aware of it or not, we all fall short in one way or another. So, if you are breathing, offense will come and you probably will offend someone else, but how we deal with the offense says a lot about who we are. I do not know of one person that will have a happy, peaceful, joyous and blessed life with unforgiveness.

There were many times throughout the years when I wondered will I ever be able to let go and heal from what was done me. I wanted to rehearse in my mind over and over the offense. I had to come to realize I may never get an apology or have a healthy reconciliation or communication with that person(s). Even with no apologies or acknowledgment for wrong-doings, I had options. It is important for us to know we have options. We decide. We get to choose to rehearse it or we choose to receive peace and rest and understand God’s love and forgiveness in our own lives. Understanding who I am in Christ and what I have received from Him has helped me to let it go. We have to choose to stop the vicious cycle that will hinder our walk with the Lord. I was going to have to choose to trust and have faith in His promise to protect and fight for me. By holding on to unforgiveness, I was only hurting myself.

▪️Letting it go does not excuse the offensive behavior.

▪️Letting it go does not mean you feel like forgiving. It is not about feelings.

▪️Letting it go does not mean you trust the person and will become their best friend.

▪️Letting it go does not mean the offense never happened and you forget.

▪️Letting it go does not mean the pain goes away right away.

▪️Letting it go does not mean you are a weak person and you are allowing people to walk all over you.

▪️Letting it go begins the process of healing.

▪️Letting it go means you choose life, peace and rest found in Christ.

Just a little story…I felt like the Lord wanted me to write a letter to someone that I had a strained relationship with. I did not know it was going to take me writing the letter three times before I would get the heart of what God was wanting to do. Well, the first letter I knew I could NOT give the person the letter or it would cause “World War III”, but writing it down allowed me to release some of my feelings. My second letter was a lot more civilized and but still it was about me and my feelings and I felt a sense of release, peace and a healing in my heart, but I knew the person would not and could not receive what I trying to convey and still would not have resolved anything. Over the next two days I waited for direction from the Lord. As I continued to wait and ponder, the Lord showed me first two letters were for my own healing sake and then suddenly the Lord showed me something so profound. He showed me the persons pain for a split second. I realized, I could not see the pain in the other person until He healed me of my pain. I realized then, the other person will never see my pain or anyone else’s pain until God heals them of their own pain. He also showed me that the person needed love, some instructions and options. So the third letter was about recognizing their pain and apologizing for any pain I may have caused them. I then shared about the meaning of forgiveness and that we do have options to our behavior. We get to choose. We do not have to allow turmoil in our lives. The Lord also wanted the person to know how much He loved them. There were no hostile words in the letter and when I read the letter, the person cried and said, “what a nice letter,” and asked me, “can I give you a hug?” Now, before the third letter was read, the situation between us was pretty sensitive. Everything was not resolved in that moment, but when I waited on the Lord and received His love and healing in my own life, it opened the door for God to do more. I could give God‘s unconditional love in that moment.

God knows how to break the barriers better than we ever could, if we just let it go. There is nothing is more powerful than God’s love. God’s love transcends. We have to understand the love and forgiveness we have received so we can give it away freely to others who may not know or have experienced His love.

Managing your expectations is important - we do not always understand or know why people behave certain ways. So we should bring our thoughts captive so that we can obey Christ’s commands (2 Corinthians 10:5). Let’s always remember His ways even when it hurts the most because even in the pain His way is always better. Jesus is our great example. The Bible commands us to:

Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you (Luke 6:27–28). - You can not give a love you have not received. We are to love people the way God loves people because we are His children and a reflection of Him.

Do not sin by letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry (Ephesians 4:26 NLT). - Self control is important. Our emotions may try to rule us, but we have options. We do not have to get out of control and think we can say and do anything just because we are angry.

Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone - especially to those in the family of faith (Galatians 6:10). - We should have the mindset of our Father, God. He does good to us even when we don’t deserve it.

When he was insulted, he did not answer back with an insult; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but placed His hopes in God, the righteous Judge (1 Peter 2:23 GNB). - Jesus was the greatest example of Humility. He did not feel the need to defend himself because He was so engrained in His Father’s love that He did not need to respond to insults and accusations. He was confident His Father would fight for Him. We too can be like Jesus because He lives in us and our Father will fight for us. Powerful!

Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone. Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the Lord (‭‭Romans‬ ‭12:17-19‬ ‭NLT‬‬) - We do not have to stoop down and lower our standard to make a point and fight for ourselves. Always take the high road and let God fight your battles.

Nobody said it would be easy and we should know the pitfalls of unforgiveness. Ultimately, unforgiveness can create pains, illnesses and diseases in our bodies. This is why it so important that we let it go. If we can get a picture of all the non-life producing things that are attached to unforgiveness, we can make an informed decision to choose Life, Love and forgiveness instead. Let’s take a look some things that are attached to unforgiveness.

God wants us free from the tactics of the enemy, but we also get to choose whether or not we want that freedom. There are things that we do that can hinder the forgiveness process. We should be aware of what they are and keep ourselves free in the freedom in which Christ has set us free. The bible says, So Christ has truly set us free. Now make sure that you stay free, and don’t get tied up again in slavery (‭‭Galatians‬ ‭5:1‬ ‭NLT‬‬).

In closing, forgiveness is the gift we give ourselves. It is not about if the other person deserves it or not. Understanding the love we have received is important in giving it to others. We cannot give what we don’t know we have. There is an enemy that comes to still kill and destroy everything God has given us, but God sent his Son, Jesus so that we can have life and have it more abundantly (John 10:10). I am grateful God sent His son so that we can experience the true life and love that is found in Him. Jesus came to destroy the works of the enemy (1 John 3:8) and we decide to stand on God’s promises no matter what comes our way. We choose to do things God’s way even when it hurts. We decide whether we will live in the fullness of all He has to offer or not. Let go of any and everything that would hold us back from receiving His promise of the abundant life.

Here’s a prayer to get you started on your forgiveness journey:

Father, thank you for showing me my need to forgive. I understand that not everyone is perfect and we all have short comings, that is why we need You, because we all have a sin nature within us. Father, draw me closer to You and help me to understand Your forgiveness and Your love you have for me so that I can give it to others. It is Your will for me to do good to those who despitefully misuse me and to bless those who curse me. I choose today to do things Your way Lord and not my own way. Thank you for Your unconditional, transcending Love that I can show to others. Thank you for completing the work you have started in me. You are faithful Lord and You are greatly to be praised. In Jesus Name. Amen.